So good to hear from you mama.
First thing I just need to say thank you. You are the sweetest. I hope
I didn't worry you to much. when I tell you things I do not tell you
them to make you stressed, though I know me telling you this will do
no good because you will worry anyway.
Also before I forget: tell carson thank you for making doodle happy
with dedicating that song to him. I don't know why but the small
things just mean the most. And i appreciate that you tell me those
things. Makes me feel like everyone is ok at home.
I already emailed dad and told him this and you can both read both
emails. I am not sending out a big one today, unless you want to
publish this one. I am good with whatever. But I am going to be real
in this email.
I am so far away from home. It makes my heart ache because ya, I have
never really done anything without you guys. This place is wonderful
though I was confused my first few days why my heart wasn't happier. i
mean for goodness sakes I have been waiting and pinning for 8 months
to get here. Then I came to this beautiful "small" city of Cherkassy
and just felt, sad. Because it is hard. We talk in Russian, yes I knew
we would be doing that. Ha! i remember the first time I heard a small
small child start talking in Russian and I panicked. SMALL CHILDREN
SPEAK RUSSIAN. EVEN BABIES. HOW DO THEY KNOW THIS LANGUAGE?! It is
pretty crazy. One of the hard things about Cherkassy is the fact that
we have no investigtors here. We are searching everyday. Doing so
many different activities to try and find. We even teach two levels of
english classes to attract people. Most of the people tell us that
they don't need the gospel here. There have been real moments of
struggle as people warn us to never come back again or scream in our
faces. (Mom don't worry I am ok). But I love these people anyway,
because I know that God loves them and he wants them to come home.
They may just not be ready right now. And that is ok. We will keep
searching. there are rare but beautiful moments when we find people
on the street who will stop and talk and take the book of Mormon. But
they never want to meet later for more information. It is ok. I am
determined and I know that God is preparing at least someone here to
accept the gospel. We may just have to dig through the entire city in
order to find them. As for the Russian! This is crazy stuff. I can't
believe I am actually speaking this language. There is SO MUCH I do
not know. Also people talk a mile and hour here and I think I have
realized why. They have such giant words that no one would actually be
able to speak the language unless they fly over the words. ;P
Mama. The pain is real. I have never experienced anything like this
and I know it will continue to get harder. But all I can do is be
grateful. There is no other way I could so completely turn and rely on
my Savior and grow this much. I feel him with me everyday. I pray all
day and it brings me a lot of peace. Satan is very real. not only to
the people here we are trying to help, but he is real for the
missionaries. He does not want us here. He knows the prophecy that
there will be 100's of thousands of people converted to the Lord here
and temple spires dotting the land and he is persistent. I am learning
that we have to be more persistent than the adversary will be.
Now for a great moment of much importance.
YOU ALL SHOULD BE SO PROUD OF ME:
there was a baby SPIDER in the hair of the Babooshka we were teaching
the other day. I took it out with my BARE HAND. how incredible is
that? President Packer says we need to celebrate and count each
victory we have during the day since this mission is really hard.
Well, VICTORY!!!! It was a huge deal for me. Because I hate spiders so
much. After I took it out I wanted my hand to fall off. BUT there was
no way I could just leave it there. I really love that Babooshka.
Cherkassy is beautiful. everything is so green and the buildings are
just fantastic. Oh, did I mention that my church building is PINK?! It
is. I love it oh so much. We had about 40 members there on Sunday and
there is many inactives as well that we work with. I bore a 5 minute
testimony on the book of mormon in sacrament! Can you believe it? I
was embarrassed because the branch president could see my legs just
shaking behind the podium.
I know it is all going to be ok. I so appreciate your prayers. I feel
them so strongly and hearing from you all really does make everything
ok. This is really hard but I want you to know that I am ok and that
this is worth it. Pray for these people, pray for me and my companion.
It is hard because this is her last transfer and she has to train a
new B who is so reliant on her. I understand it is tough and she is
awesome. Hopefully my Russian will just grow better and better. I love
you guys so much.
Mom read dad's email too because it explains more.
I am so glad AK had a great birthday and you have all been doing so
great. Mom you really do fly up that hill don't you?1 so excited for
you to train me on the bike when I get back :D I know that I can do
this, because God is here. This is his work. I am lucky and blessed to
be a part of it.
I love you so much! Have a wonderful amazing grand week! I will too.
PS: I will try to send some photos :) <3
PPS: I wish I had more time. :(