Wednesday, July 29, 2015

"good intentions are not enough"

July 27, 2015

Hello family and friends,

Thank you for the prayers. Missionaries need prayers and they really
do strengthen us and help us. I am so grateful to be a missionary.

I loved something today that Brother Seymour sent me: "Can you imagine not having this experience?  I am so proud of you—you are an amazing young woman, and I am so  grateful you are a friend.  We pray for you, and know that you are guided thru the spirit.  Everyday, make a difference.  Be obedient.  Pray for guidance.  If I could go back and do my mission over I would ditch the busy crap, and focus on the spirit more.  Focus on the day, bringing others to Christ.  Don’t worry about the things that don’t matter.  I would wake up in the morning, and ask the Lord, where will thou have me go?  And go—and then come home, dog tired, lay down and do it all over again. I think that is what a disciple really is—it’s not about glory, honor and titles—it’s about THEIR salvation.  The rest of it is just clutter. The less clutter, the more you can do."

This is excatly what I want to do. On Tuesday this week I will be
talking a bit about intrinsic motivation with my companion at our Zone Conference. She will start off and then I will speak.
"This topic of intrinsic motivation has been interesting for me to
study this past while. and I want to focus on when we are "running out of steam" or have a lack of motivation. Somehow throughout my life I have just felt this internal motivation to work without problem. And I have just always done as I know I should. Motivation came naturally and I really loved to work hard, from my own desire.

So what does this have to do about "running out of steam"? Well when
we were assigned this topic I honestly felt dread-because I did not
know how I could talk about this intrinsic motivation that I felt I was suddenly lacking. for some reason or another this last transfer has been really hard for me. I have had great companions, we saw many miracles and so forth.but  I have struggled internally. I became really sad, really serious for no apparent reason.

We continued to work but somedays I felt like my heart just was not in it completely. I felt a lack of motivation to fully continue on.

Some mornings I even found myself fighting myself just to simply get
out of bed and start another day.

That is a problem.

the more time I spent focusing on myself the worse it got. The sadness just grew and grew.

I did not want to feel this way and frequently got on my kees asking
God to continue to give me stregth to do the work-and a desire to
continue on. I began reading my scriptures more earnestly trying to
find answers and a cure to this strange behavior. Everywhere I read
God sent me giant flashing signs!

Signs about Fatih. Faith is action. I read about how even the smallest
act of discipleship can help our faith to grow. Sometimes even our
smallest acts- when we feel that is all that we can give that day,
they are the beginning of the kindling of what can later become a
raging fire-a life dedicated to discipleship of Jesus Christ.

James 1:22 writes: "Be ye doers fo the word, and not hearers only..."

Again Uchtdorf says, "We must be willing to make sacrifices and not
just declarations to follow the Savior."

In order to become a great missionary to fulfill our divine potential
we will always be asked to sacrifice- AND to just go out and ACT.

"Good intentions are not enough-we must do!" -uchtdorf

President Klebingat said," When running out of steam... the secret is
to take corrective ACTION immediately.
Thus if you:

Don't feel like opening your mouth this moment... you will do it immediately.

Don't feel like brining up something with your companion... you will do it now!

don't feel like role playing everyday... you will make it happen.

Don't feel like asking for a referral from the next person... you will do it!

Don't feel like exercising right this morning... you will make yourself sweat!

don't feel like you are focused mentally... you will immediately refocus!

If we need to change something we need to not be afraid to do it.
RIGHT NOW. Don't just tell ourselves, tomorrow or next week I will be
better.
We can not let our expectations drop. PMG pg 10 talks about what will
happen when we let our expectations drop.

True happiness in this work comes through action.

Why are we here on missions? What are our reasons?
-Here for the Savior and because of the Savior.
-He has done it all for us and we can do something for Him.
-Jesus Christ is our reason. He is our hope.
-Let us always remember Him
-And work for the right reasons
_it will help it to be easier
-we can do hard things
-This work is so happy. it is salvation
-We can find strength in obedience, action and so on.

We need to act out of love for the Savior. I am so grateful to be a
missionary. We can do hard things. Christ is our friend and our guide.
With him we can do all things."

there are hard moments always, been when we take a moment to look back
we see how many miracles have happened, how much we have grown, how
many blessings have been poured down on us. We begin to be happy and
we can see the hand of God. BECAUSE GOD IS HERE.

I love Ukraine so much and I am thankful for every moment I have here.

some things from this week:

I GAVE MY FIRST FULL LENGTH TALK in ALL RUSSIAN on Sunday. Naturally I
was asked to speak on how my family strengthens me in the gospel. you
guys really do. you are the most important people in the world to me
and even from here I feel close to you. You give me strength and help
me to continue serving. There is no other place in the world I am
supposed to be in right now. It is all about the people and for me my
work for God is in Ukraine right now. I was reading in Luke when
little boy Christ was teaching in the temple and his parents came back
looking for him asking him why he has left them and asking him if he
had realized how much they had worried and been sad because he was not
with them? His answer was simple and PROFOUND. He said, "know ye not
that I be about my Father's business."
The Father must come first. Everything we do must come out of love for
a Father who gave us all, even His most precious son, Jesus christ. We
are saved because of Him. I am so grateful.

This week as I wrote I tried to focus on acting more and we had both
awesome and interesting experiences talking to people on the streets.
The more I strive to just let go and let God, the more I see His hand
and His word. In these past 5 weeks we have given 89 Books of Mormon.
I know it is not about numbers but to me that is 89 more people with
one more step towards truth. We are working hard and Cherkassy is
looking brighter. We may even have one investigator ready for baptism
on August 29. MIRACLES are happening and I need to learn to find the
joy in all these things.

I love you all so much and I hope you have a wonderful week. I miss
you and can not wait for the day I get to come show you Ukraine. It is
my happy place. I feel the spirit so strong here and I am growing and
learning and being tried. It is all for our good. I am so grateful for
the knowledge of the plan. It is true. NEVER DOUBT. ALWAYS LOVE. Be
BOLD. BE BRAVE. REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE.

I love you guys to the moon and back. Praying for you always. Be safe.
Know I love you.

Love Sister Karren

went to a village today. almost cried it was so beautiful and GUESS WHO HAS calluses on her fingers from a good day of work in the garden?! THIS GIRL. SO EXCITED

A boy on his bike in the most beautiful village.

My District

MY FAVORITE PEOPLE HERE. I love these kids so much



No comments:

Post a Comment